Holy Matrimony

Marriage Preparation

Congratulations on your Engagement!

1661 The sacrament of Matrimony signifies the union of Christ and the Church. It gives spouses the grace to love each other with the love with which Christ has loved his Church; the grace of the sacrament thus perfects the human love of the spouses, strengthens their indissoluble unity, and sanctifies them on the way to eternal life (cf. Council of Trent: DS 1799).
We are very excited you are considering preparing for the Holy Sacrament of Matrimony at St. Stephen the First Martyr Catholic Church. This is a time of great joy and excitement. It is also a time filled with lots of planning and preparation. It is precisely why, in Her wisdom, the Church asks each couple to slow down and spend time preparing for this beautiful sacrament and lifelong vocation. Marriage preparation is designed to help support and guide each couple in strengthening their relationship with God and one another.

An intentional desire by a couple to participate in this process is a good indication the serious understanding they have of the commitment they are undertaking. After reading the following information about our marriage preparation program, we invite you to contact us to begin the process.
Catholic Understanding of Marriage 
 
 1601 "The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament."
 
1603 "The intimate community of life and love which constitutes the married state has been established by the Creator and endowed by him with its own proper laws.... God himself is the author of marriage." The vocation to marriage is written in the very nature of man and woman as they came from the hand of the Creator. Marriage is not a purely human institution despite the many variations it may have undergone through the centuries in different cultures, social structures, and spiritual attitudes. These differences should not cause us to forget its common and permanent characteristics. Although the dignity of this institution is not transparent everywhere with the same clarity,some sense of the greatness of the matrimonial union exists in all cultures. "The well-being of the individual person and of both human and Christian society is closely bound up with the healthy state of conjugal and family life."
 
Marriage Preparation in the Catholic Church 
A marriage is a lifelong permanent bond between one man and one woman. In addition, A wedding in the Catholic Church is a religious event, requiring a public act of faith by the couple who are asking the Church, the priest and the assembled community, to witness their exchange of vows and pray that their new covenant of mutual life and love will continue to be an enduring sign to others of Jesus' intimate and faithful covenant with the People of God.
Thoughtful and responsible preparation assists a couple in building a strong foundation for the lifelong commitment of marriage. In order to marry in the Catholic Church, a couple must first complete all steps of the marriage preparation process. The reality of simultaneously planning a wedding and juggling other day-to-day responsibilities, can be a challenge. We encourage engaged couples to begin the preparation process even earlier. The requirements for marriage preparation in the Diocese of Raleigh may be viewed on the  Diocese of Raleigh website
The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops  marriage website has more resources for preparing for your upcoming marriage. 

Frequently Asked Questions

What if we have not been attending Mass anywhere?
Many couples find their time of marriage preparation also becomes an opportunity to reconnect and begin practicing their faith once again. If you do not have a parish that you call "home," we  invite you to consider St. Stephen the First Martyr.  We welcome you home and look forward to you becoming part of our parish family!  

Couples are welcome to prepare for marriage at here at St. Stephen the First Martyr. We ask that you complete a registration form or register online. Once you are a part of the community, it would then be appropriate to begin your marriage preparation at St. Stephen the First Martyr.  Couples enrolled in our program should be attending Mass at St. Stephen the First Martyr throughout their marriage preparation leading them to a life together that includes actively practicing their faith.
 
What if one of us has been married before?
If one or both of you  have a prior marriage, whether in the Catholic Church or by any other civil or religious authority, even if you are NOT Catholic, you must obtain a Declaration of Nullity (annulment)  prior to entering into a marriage in the Catholic Church. If this is a situation for you or your intended spouse, please make sure to discuss this at the beginning of your marriage preparation.

What if one of us isn't Catholic?
Only one person is required to be a baptized Catholic to be married in the Catholic Church. Although there will be additional paperwork to be done when a Catholic marries a non catholic, this is not difficult. A permission or dispensation is simply to ensure both parties understand and agree any children coming from their marital union will be raised in the Catholic faith. In addition, the Catholic party affirms that marrying a person who does not share their Catholic faith will not cause them to stop practicing their Catholic faith. During this time of preparation, there will be opportunities allowing each couple to discuss the spiritual/religious beliefs and how this will be lived out in their married life together.  

Can we have our civil union blessed by the Church?
Yes, we call this a “convalidation.” if you have been married civilly and desire to have your marriage "validated” in the Catholic Church, we are happy to assist you in doing this. in  most cases, the steps for this are similar to the full marriage preparation program as stated above.

Recommended Article: Weddings in the Catholic Church